Crying in the Boardroom: Breaking the Myth of Weakness in Leadership

crying in the boardroom

For decades, leadership has been framed as stoic, unshakable, and emotionally impenetrable. Many executives believe showing emotion, especially crying in the boardroom, undermines credibility. But this assumption misses the truth: vulnerability does not equal weakness. In fact, crying in the boardroom can be a powerful sign of resilience, humanity, and authentic leadership.


The Stigma Around Tears at Work

Corporate culture has long associated tears with fragility. A leader who sheds tears risks being judged as “too emotional,” “unprofessional,” or “unfit to lead.” This stigma is particularly sharp for women leaders, who already face stereotypes like the “angry Black woman” or the “overly sensitive female executive.”

Yet leadership isn’t about suppressing emotions; it’s about understanding and channeling them. Crying in the boardroom challenges outdated expectations and reframes emotion as a natural part of being human—and an essential part of being an effective leader.


When Crying Meets Resilience

A high school recital gone wrong. A humiliating meeting in an executive setting. A confronting exercise in race and privilege. These moments highlight that emotions can surface when the stakes are high.

But what happens after the tears is what truly matters. Leaders who dry their eyes, return to the table, and continue forward demonstrate resilience. Crying in the boardroom becomes a catalyst for strength—not a setback.


Vulnerability Builds Trust

Leaders who show vulnerability often create deeper trust with their teams. When employees see their leaders as real people—flawed, emotional, and authentic—they feel more connected.

Research consistently shows that teams with emotionally intelligent leaders report higher engagement and loyalty. Why? Because vulnerability signals transparency. It tells the team: I am human, just like you.

By crying in the boardroom, leaders remind their teams that empathy and honesty are not liabilities but assets.


Emotional Intelligence in Action

Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage both your own emotions and those of others. For leaders, this means:

  • Recognizing triggers — Understanding why a situation brings tears or anger.
  • Regulating responses — Choosing to respond with clarity, even when emotions run high.
  • Empathizing with others — Allowing personal emotion to build bridges, not walls.
  • Transforming emotion into courage — Using tears or anger as fuel to speak truth with conviction.

When leaders develop emotional intelligence, crying in the boardroom ceases to be seen as a loss of control. Instead, it becomes an act of strength and connection.


Breaking Gendered Expectations

The pressure to “never let them see you cry” is especially acute for women in leadership. Men who show emotion are often seen as passionate or strong. Women, however, are frequently labeled “weak” or “unstable.”

By challenging this double standard, crying in the boardroom redefines what it means to lead. True leadership is not about mimicking outdated masculine ideals—it’s about embracing authenticity.


How Leaders Can Embrace Healthy Vulnerability

  1. Acknowledge, don’t suppress. Recognize when emotions surface instead of forcing them down.
  2. Pair vulnerability with purpose. Tears should lead to action, resilience, or insight.
  3. Reframe the narrative. Position emotional moments as demonstrations of humanity, not flaws.
  4. Support others’ vulnerability. Normalize emotion by creating safe spaces for teams to express themselves.
  5. Reflect and learn. Ask: What triggered the emotion? How can I use it constructively?

With these practices, crying in the boardroom becomes a stepping stone toward more authentic and impactful leadership.


Stories That Redefine Strength

When a leader was berated in a public meeting but saved tears for a private moment, she discovered resilience was not about suppressing emotion but recovering quickly.

When another leader wept during a privilege walk, her tears revealed inequities her words alone could not capture. Instead of weakening her, it strengthened the dialogue.

These stories remind us: crying in the boardroom does not diminish leadership—it deepens it.


Conclusion: Tears as a Leadership Superpower

The myth that leaders must be unfeeling, steel-faced icons of authority is crumbling. Modern leadership thrives on emotional intelligence, authenticity, and courage. Vulnerability is not a liability—it’s a superpower.

The next time you think of crying in the boardroom, don’t picture weakness. Picture resilience, trust, and leadership that is both human and strong.